When I get stressed or overwhelmed, I sometimes find myself thinking things like: My job is too hard. Nothing is working out for me. Nobody does anything for me.
Notice the common theme? Me. The problem often isn’t the world — it’s the amount of space I give myself inside my own head.
One way to think about stress is that it’s an over-focus on ourselves. We get trapped in our own thoughts, our own expectations, our own disappointments. And the quickest way out of that loop is surprisingly simple:
Get over yourself.
I don’t mean pack up and go save the world (unless that’s your calling). I mean right now — in your everyday interactions. When you’re in front of another person, be fully with them. Look them in the eye. Ask how they’re doing — and actually wait for the answer. When you're in the elevator, ask the person next to you how their day is going instead of staring at the floor.
You don’t have to feel like doing it. Just do it anyway.
It’s not about pretending your challenges don’t exist. It’s about giving your mind a break from constantly centering you. Because when you shift the focus outward, even briefly, something freeing happens: you feel lighter.
My mother is incredible at this. She focuses on her family, her clients, the people around her — and she rarely complains. She is one of the most consistently content people I’ve ever met. And it’s not because her life is easy. It’s because her attention isn’t trapped inside herself.
Letting go of the constant need for validation, protection, and self-concern is liberating.It opens space for joy. For connection. For relief.
Try this: For the next 5 minutes, intentionally do something for someone else — send a kind message, hold the door, ask someone a genuine question. Then ask yourself:
How did it feel to get over yourself?
Liberating. Or maybe — I couldn’t do it for the full 5 minutes. Either way, you learned something important.
You get to choose where your attention goes. Choose well.